Mom Rage: Let’s Talk About It
Mom Rage: The Unspoken Struggle Every Mom Knows (But No One Talks About)
Let’s talk about mom rage—because if you’re a mom, you’ve been there. That moment when your toddler refuses to nap for the 37th day in a row, your partner asks where the diapers are (as if you’re the only one who can remember), and then, your coffee spills all over the kitchen counter for the third time in 30 minutes. You try to keep it together, but inside, you’re boiling. That’s mom rage, and it’s real.
You love your kids, but some days… you just want to scream into a pillow and hide in a closet for a solid hour. Sound familiar? If it does, you’re not alone.
What Is Mom Rage?
Mom rage is that intense, often sudden, surge of frustration, anger, and exhaustion that almost every mom feels at some point. It's that overwhelming urge to scream, cry, or throw something when everything seems to be going wrong, and your patience has just reached its limit. It’s the kind of anger that comes from being tired, overwhelmed, and drained from trying to be everything to everyone—without the space to focus on yourself.
You’re juggling a thousand things, and at the end of the day, it can feel like no one really sees how hard you’re working. You’re burnt out, emotionally spent, and that one little thing—whether it’s a tantrum, a misplaced shoe, or the hundredth question of the day—sends you over the edge.
And let’s be honest: That’s okay. Feeling angry and frustrated doesn’t make you a bad mom. It makes you human.
Why Does Mom Rage Happen?
Mom rage doesn’t come out of nowhere. There’s a whole bunch of stuff going on under the surface. Here’s what might be triggering it:
Chronic exhaustion: Let’s face it—if you’re a mom, you’re probably tired all the time. Between night feedings, toddler tantrums, work, and everything else, there’s no time to recharge. And when you’re running on empty, your patience gets thin, fast.
Overwhelm: Trying to do it all—be the best mom, partner, employee, friend, etc.—is a recipe for burnout. You’re carrying the weight of everyone else’s needs and it feels like there’s no room left for your own.
Guilt and expectations: Society puts this insane pressure on moms to be perfect. Social media only adds fuel to that fire, with every other mom seeming to have their life together. And when you can’t live up to that impossible standard, the frustration builds.
Feeling invisible: You’re doing ALL the things—cooking, cleaning, caring, planning—and often, it feels like no one notices or appreciates it. That lack of recognition can build up into anger that feels like it’s directed at everything and everyone.
You don’t have to “just deal with it.” Mom rage is a signal that something needs to change. It's not something you should ignore or brush off. You deserve to feel seen, heard, and supported—and that’s where therapy comes in.
What Does Mom Rage Look Like?
It can show up in a few different ways, including:
Exploding over small things: Losing your mind over a spilled drink or a toy on the floor may seem like an overreaction, but it’s really just the final straw after a long day (or week) of feeling overwhelmed.
Crying uncontrollably: Sometimes mom rage doesn’t explode outward—it implodes inward, and you end up in a puddle of tears from the sheer weight of it all.
Avoiding your kids: Maybe you need to take a breather from the constant chaos and just hide in the bathroom for five minutes of quiet. (We’ve all been there.)
Feeling guilty: After an outburst or snapping at your kid (because let’s face it, it happens), you feel like a terrible mom. The guilt creeps in, which makes you feel even worse and sets off the cycle of anger, guilt, and frustration again.
But here’s the thing—you’re not a terrible mom. Mom rage doesn’t mean you’re a failure, it just means you’re human. It’s your brain and body’s way of saying, “Hey, I need a break!”
How to Cope with Mom Rage (Without Feeling Like a Monster)
Okay, so now that we’ve named it and understood where it comes from, what do we do about it? Here are some ways to manage mom rage and start taking care of yourself so you can break free from the cycle of frustration and guilt:
Take a break (even if it’s just for five minutes): Give yourself permission to walk away when things get too overwhelming. Step outside, lock yourself in the bathroom, or put on your favorite song and just breathe. You’re not abandoning your kids—you’re recharging.
Talk it out: Share how you’re feeling with your partner, a friend, or a therapist. Sometimes just venting and having someone truly listen can make a huge difference.
Set boundaries: Say no to things that don’t serve you. Whether it’s overcommitting to family events, taking on more work than you can handle, or agreeing to plans when you’re already stretched thin—it’s okay to say no.
Practice self-compassion: Be gentle with yourself. Motherhood is hard, and it’s okay to admit that. When you feel rage building, acknowledge your emotions instead of shaming yourself for them. You’re doing your best, and that’s enough.
Get support: Therapy is a game-changer for moms dealing with mom rage. Working with a therapist helps you process emotions, set healthy boundaries, and manage stress in a way that doesn’t lead to rage. If you're in California, I offer virtual therapy for millennial moms, and we’ll work together to tackle burnout, guilt, and anxiety while reclaiming your peace of mind.
The Bottom Line: You’re Not Alone
Mom rage isn’t something you should have to live with. You’re doing the hardest job on earth—and it’s okay to feel frustrated, overwhelmed, or angry sometimes. But you don’t have to be stuck in that cycle. By recognizing mom rage for what it is, you can take steps to get support, set boundaries, and take care of yourself.
If you’re ready to break free from mom rage and start feeling like yourself again, I’m here to help. Through therapy, we’ll work together to address the underlying causes of your rage, get you the support you deserve, and find ways to bring peace back into your life.
Ready to reclaim your sanity? Book a FREE 15-minute consult today. Let’s tackle mom rage together and start creating the balanced, peaceful motherhood you deserve.
